Molly’s Blog.

Stages In The Work of Self-Transformation


When work on oneself takes hold, things start happening that we perhaps thought were not possible. It is almost as if our efforts do not bear fruit until the energies shift.  All of a sudden, we start spontaneously waking up and noticing with a new found awareness. We may be working for some time without those results. I often hear people say they don’t get it and nothing is happening.

Until it does…

That is why people attracted to the work of presence and spiritual freedom have a sense that there is something in the teaching without really knowing. One smells it from afar. One knows there is something there that they want and need. They are the ones that will go to the inner sanctum.

They have patience.

They have curiosity.

They have humility.

As well, life may be just bad enough that they know they need it.

For those who have learned to bypass what’s going on in them and have learned to “stay positive” at all costs, they will miss this particular boat.

For those who grasp spiritual ideas with their intellect and mistake it for knowledge and understanding without regarding what is actually happening in their lives, they too will miss this boat.

For those who have a sense that something is here, they enter a path that starts to work on them as much as they work on themselves.

They start to wake up and realize that they are waking up.

It gets easier and happens more often. That’s when they know something is here. They have moments of awareness of their awareness that does not feel like anything they have known before.

The work gains traction and the use of practical awareness tools becomes much more meaningful.

We develop our own “I” from a coalescence of parts that are so disparate that we didn’t know they even existed. We start to see what reaction is about. We see into the how, what, and why without the analysis (which does not lead to this kind of understanding).

There are multiple stages. Some have to do with awareness and then down the road some have to do with consciousness in which every choice is permanently transforming our lives. We have access to something very invisible that is affecting our lives greatly. We know when that pool is depleted. We are sensitive to our inner states, our reactions, and our strengthened ability to attend to both of these things.

We develop the chance for the energy of consciousness to work upon us. Rather, we gain the opportunity to participate in a new world. It is something we all share but we are very unaware of it until we are able to open the door to this new world.

The inner struggle takes a new form and a new category of experience. We see how divided we are. We have enough development and discernment to abide with this dichotomy within us. This stage has the force behind it. Reaction and negative emotion are anticipated and diffused or rarely coming up at all. The neutrality is actual. It is not “spiritual bypassing” as we see in the first stages. There is strength in “seeing” and a self acceptance that was not possible before.

It may appear from the outside that we are undergoing transformation of the first sort when in fact it is happening on a profound level…a Being level. The conscious energy is coming into being within us as the mighty creative force blends with our maintenance of sensitive energy.

This stage makes very big footprints. Large parts of our personality fall away and our essence emerges as if we are reborn.

From my perspective of working with people over many years, this is when The Work of Self Transformation truly begins. We have a chance at this point to intend attention. Things become volitional within our awareness. We realize we have choice. We have true power to see who we are and it sticks.

There are many reasons for this which is material for another article. Let it suffice to say, it is the point when we develop a body outside of this physical one to house our consciousness. That becomes the vehicle for divine will to enter our lives. That is when we are the liaison between heaven and earth. We manifest because we are working under fewer laws. We are not dealing with reaction and negative emotion. We are dealing with the action of self remembering.

Past this stage is yet another level in which the Ego is absorbed into the void and one must relinquish one’s “I”. The Sufis called it “fana” and it has parallel qualities of the lower stages, but very much impossible without the solid formation of yet a higher spiritual body to house one’s eternal self. It is the inner struggle to relinquish all. The inner struggle is that of conscience in its most concentrated form in which one surrenders to a Higher Will. It is the impulse of Love through immortality.

Each is like stepping through a door.

The Awareness School is running several local and online courses throughout the year. We are currently preparing for rough and ready camping retreats on our brand new property in the San Juan islands as well as some urban Seattle retreats in the works. If you are intrigued by what you are reading here, then get in touch with me.





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