Right effort and the power of struggle is the second source of transformation in John Bennett’s book, Transformation. There are countless writings on right effort from the Zoroastrian tradition to Buddhist teachings. We all struggle with something, but much of that is avoidable, if we learn the deeper meaning of right effort. To intentionally struggle with our own negative states is the path, but this gets completely misunderstood. This article is an attempt to clarify the meaning of conscious labor and intentional suffering. We are familiar with the saying no pain, no gain, but many frown upon this in the … [read more]
Recent performances have led me to study the energetic scapegoat within myself. The energetic scapegoat unconsciously takes on the shadow of others. We are all familiar with the concept of the scapegoat, whether it is in a family, a community or a group of people in society. They take on the shadow aspects of the group whether they have agreed to this or not. They are blamed for the things that don’t run smoothly. They are criticized. They also learn to take on this shadow for others because of deep identification with internalized societal or parental definitions of themselves even … [read more]
Egypt is calling and has been calling me my entire life. The hilarious thing is Egypt has literally been calling me on my cell phone. It is most assuredly a spam call, but when I see the word Egypt under the number, I smile, and take it as confirmation that everything is on target and in perfect timing. My first visit to Egypt happened in my late twenties when my sister and I decided to go on an adventure. We read books on Egyptian Magic, hieroglyphics, and general history in order to enrich our three week experience. Though we would … [read more]
Removing our armor can take a lifetime, but it doesn’t have to if we learn how to become vulnerable to our grief.
The second force can be understood in terms of opposition, struggle, intentional suffering, and is experienced as a phenomenon that pushes against an affirming or active force. It may be implemented by us in the form of work on oneself or it can come from the outside in the form of conscious shocks. There are always two opposing forces, often unnoticed by most unless the resistance is so strong that to have something come to fruition, one must push beyond normal efforts. To study the effects of these laws within us enables an awareness of a third force which serves … [read more]
I recently had a three day retreat alone in the woods and experienced deep fear within myself rising to the surface. I felt as though the land was assisting with this release in a rather mysterious way. I have not experienced fear like this in a very long time. It was as if I had reverted to a time before I started meditating thirty years ago. A time when I was constantly questioning myself and my worth. I walked an anxiety tightrope that would not let up. I learned to function in spite of this gripping fear. It was not … [read more]