As the Awareness School year progresses with many groups in session, I am struck by a clearer understanding of various stages of this great Spiritual Work. Whether that be gathered from one on one meetings or the women’s group or the various classes within the introductory Practical Awareness Course or from our studies of vigilance in the Tuesday night group, we span a spectrum of experience that seeks freedom. Across the board, something has become more solidified for me regarding sign posts of these stages, and so I offer a brief overview. My intention is to elucidate certain aspects of … [read more]
Blog
The Elusive Center
Our theme of vigilance is revealing something about the elusive feeling center. Last Tuesday many tried to describe what emerged when in this type of vigilance meditation as we rested in curiosity and stillness without expectation. We can come to know the sensation of the body on a profound level with the use of this practice. It is the foundation by which greater openings can occur. It takes us out of our heads and grounds us in an energy required for presence. If we do this practice not only in our meditation but out and about in life, it yields … [read more]
Meditative Vigilance
My meditation practice over the last 30 years is ever evolving. The stages through which I have emerged are due to the consistency of the practice. However, it is possible to meditate in ways that do not promote our evolution and in fact can hinder it. It is a slippery slope between effort and non-effort, between aiming for something and accepting what is, between discipline and abandon. This edge could be considered vigilance, but this vigilance evolves…changes character. There is a tightrope one walks where a toehold on attention balanced with letting go is a tiny back and forth motion … [read more]
Energies
Energy is a huge subject. J.G. Bennett has written extensively about them, so this is an introduction and my take on his schematic. We interpret the word energy in many ways and experience what energy is in our bodies, our thoughts and our emotions. With loss of “energy” we feel listless. We also may experience energy blocks in the form of illness, disease, or emotional anguish. However, there are energies of a higher order that feed something more than our day to day functioning. Energy by its very nature is never destroyed but only transformed. When we are interested in … [read more]
Shades of Gradation
Energy works within us. In fact, we are nothing but energy, so it stands to reason that as we refine our ability to be present, the gradation of energy working within us changes. I can be completely in my thoughts and this is a very low gradation of energy. I can be “thinking” of my body and this is still only thought energy. I can be in full blown reaction and this is thought energy depriving any build up of cohesion within me. I can notice things happening in my body with thought energy. My work with being present, in … [read more]
Learning to Choose
The wise G.I. Gurdjieff said, “man cannot choose.” The reality of this statement could not be more true, but it is up to all of us to understand why it is true. This absolutely drove me crazy when I first encountered these words. I felt like I did have choices and often attributed adverse consequences to making the wrong choice. Only until I recognized that I had no ability to choose did things begin to change for me. I saw how my actions were habitually tainted with completing a picture of myself and when that did not happen, my reactions … [read more]